Have you ever found a great piece of equipment at a bargain and bought it only to get home and as you try to operate it you get stuck because it did not come with a manual? You try to operate it with the basic knowledge you have concerning such equipment but that does not help because this is a different model. Though it looks like what you have seen before and you know what it is supposed to do, you just can’t figure out what to press to get it to do the right thing. On the outside it looks like any other similar model but the software has you all mixed up. Now this is just a piece of machinery that has no feelings and emotions, what about people?
1 Peter 3:7
7 In the same way, you husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way [with great gentleness and tact, and with an intelligent regard for the marriage relationship], as with [c]someone physically weaker, since she is a woman. Show her honor and respect as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered or ineffective.
On the outside we all look the same but what we forget is that every human being is a different model. No two people are exactly the same, not even identical twins. I have met people who make the statement “All men are the same” or “All women are the same” not true, each one of us is a unique individual with their own personality likes and dislikes.
How well do you know your spouse? Are you living with them in an understanding way?
Sometimes we get to the conclusion that we are just not compatible but the real issue is that we have not made the effort to understand our spouse, what they like, their personality, how they think, what they prefer, what makes them happy and sad…. We keep pressing one button expecting one thing and instead we get another. We have not taken the time to understand the software and because of this, we make the assumption that our spouse is faulty.
As one pastor friend once told me, “Be a student of your wife/ husband, study them every day seek to understand them to know what makes them tick”
Take a step back and refer to the manual, the bible. It will guide you on how to behave and how to navigate through the institution called marriage!